On [:] Prematurity | Samuel Beckett, 1946
“Ask the hour of a passer-by and he’ll throw it at you over his shoulder at a venture and hurry on. But you may be easy in your mind, he is not far wrong who every few minutes consults his watch, sets it by official astronomic time, makes his reckonings, wonders how on earth to fit in all he has to do before the endless day comes to an end. Or with furious weary gesture he gives the hour that besets him, the hour it always was and will be, one that to the beauties of too late unites the charms of prematurity, that of the Never! without more of an even dreader raven.
But all day that is how it is, from the first tick to the last tack, or rather from the third to the antepenultimate, allowing for the time it needs, the tamtam within, to drum you back into the dream and drum you back out again. And in between all are heard, every millet grain that falls, you look behind and there you are, every day a little closer, all life a little closer. Joy in saltspoonfuls, like water when it’s thirst you’re dying of, and a bonny little agony homeopathically distilled, what more can you ask? A heart in the room of your heart? Come come. But ask on the contrary your way of the passer-by and he’ll take your hand and lead you, by the warren’s beauty-spots, to the very place. It’s a great grey barracks of a building, unfinished, unfinishable, with two doors, for those who enter and for those who leave, and at the windows faces peering out. The more fool you to have asked.”
The cover of Notebook I is lettered: “La Forêt de Bondy / Camier et Mercier / I / Autour du pot / Les Bosquets de Bondy,” and is signed “Samuel Beckett,” with the note: “One of first writings in / French, circa 1945, / unpublished / jettisoned.” The manuscript’s beginning date is shown 5 July 1946(…)
Dark at its full. /
Yes, said Mercier.
What do you mean, yes? said Camier.
I beg your pardon, said Mercier.
You said yes, said Camier.
I said yes? said Mercier.
yes i said yes
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If we have nothing to say, said Camier, let us say nothing.
We have things to say, said Mercier.
Then why don’t we say them? said Camier.
We can’t, said Mercier.
Then let us be silent, said Camier.
But we try, said Mercier.
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Camier was reading in his notebook. He tore out the little leaves when read, crumpled them and threw them away.
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The lack of money is an evil. But it can turn to a good.
There are two needs: the need you have and the need to have it.
Intuition leads to many a folly.
What is lost is lost.
Samuel Beckett / Mercier and Camier / 1946
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Οι υπερευαίσθητοι άνθρωποι,αν δεν χάνονται σε παιδαριώδεις ονειροπολήσεις,καταλήγουν ρέκτες της παρατήρησης,με αποτέλεσμα να γίνεται η καρδιά τους μιά απίθανη κρύπτη από ιδιότυπα συμπεράσματα. Απο πολύ νέος ο Βακαλόπουλος αιχμαλώτιζε περιστατικά και τα ξεψάχνιζε κανονικά.Αυτό τον βοήθησε να αναδειχθεί σε φοβερό παρατηρητή και κατ’ επέκταση,σε μέγιστο γνώστη του δημόσιου βίου.Ήταν ένα σπάνιο είδος βιρτουόζου των κοινωνικών σχέσεων-δεινότητα που τον εξώθησε,με τον καιρό,να έχει το φέρεσθαι ενός αυτομαθούς εμπειρογνώμονα,που σε κάθε συνάντηση έπρεπε να πεί το λογάκι του.
”Κάθε βδομάδα άλλαζε γνώμη”,μου παρατήρησε ένας κοινός φίλος.Αξίζει να πούμε ότι οι πολύ έξυπνοι άνθρωποι είναι,κατα κανόνα,κοιλόγνωμοι.Ευπαθείς σαν τον ζυγό του φαρμακοτρίφτη,με το παραμικρό σαρίδι αποφαίνονται.Ο Χρήστος λάτρευε την στιγμή,συνεπώς δεν σκεφτόταν τις γενικές αρχές-που αυθωρεί γίνονται παρωπίδες-αλλά είχε εμπιστοσύνη στο ένστικτό του που βλέπει τις παραμικρές διαφορές.
Ο Χρήστος είχε αυτό τον καημό.Ήθελε να περισώσει το απαρατήρητο.
Γειά σου Ασημάκη / Κωστής Παπαγιώργης / 1993
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